I'm here I'm not here

OK so I have deleted and undeleted my blog twice, why? I HAVE NO IDEA! I feel so different a lot=change has happened wthese past few months and at the same time, things are still the same, am I making sense?

The reason I can't erase this blog permanently is that it caries a special part of me and I enjoy writing about all the random stuff in my life. My thoughts and my feelings, it's like a form of release, but right now I can't bring myself to write anything even though I have got so much to write about.

Maybe I am in a rut, I don't know whatsup with me, hopefully I can get out of this rut soon because I do miss blogging.

I know this blog doesn't make any sense and it's so random and pointless but hey at least it is a start.

Bad News

My phone rings, I answer not expecting anything.
We say our hello's and how are you's and your voice becomes slightly shaky.
I can tell immediately that something's up.
I ask you what's wrong, you become quiet.
I start to panic, my breathing shortens, I plead you to just tell me, but you remain silent.
I am almost in tears, and you say it.
You deliver the bad news, and I break into tiny little pieces ....

My bestfriend

Today is my bestie's birthday

I know I know I post a lot of posts dedicated to people, especially on 'birthdays' :P but I can't help it!

HOWEVER this is actually a continuation of one of my early posts called 'I miss you'.
You see I thought I lost a friend, but I didn't she was right there, waiting for me =)
It is funny how things easily change, how one minute you inseparable and the next you hardly speak to each other and then everything is back to normal, life can be so fickle like that.

ANYWAY this goes out to you A*
You're my one and only,
You're my dearest,
You're my girl,
You're my rock and I LOVE YOU.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABES


of course I had to post our 'song'
ahhh school days! hahahaha crazy times :P

I'm a fool to want you

Oh yes it is time for a music type post.

I love the classics, and Billie Holiday is definitely one of my favourites and after seeing the Chanel advert this song has been stuck in my head.





and since I am already posting songs, here is the amazing Etta James with 'At Last'





And last but most certainly not least here is Ella Fitzgerlad with 'Cry me a River'





No one, in the day and age, can make music as elegant and classy as this.

Saying the truth isn't always the best option ..

The title says it all, I have been put, on numerous occasions, in an awkward situation, when I knew things I wish I didn't know because then I had the choice to whether say something or not, and usually I don't say anything.

I know it is bad, but I just can never have the guts to say anything, I am afraid. I know it is such a silly thing to be afraid of but I can't help it.

Now I will just be quiet and watch helplessly and just pray that things work out themselves.

One thing I know if things do go too far, I'll have to 'man' up and say something, but till then, I'll just be a watcher.

to the year 2011

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!

I don't know about you guys, but 2010 passed by so fast it is insane! It is already 2011! SHIZ!

Well hopefully it ends up being a good year. I made some resolutions which I did not tell anyone, I though it is better doing that, maybe they will end up happening. Inshallah 5eir.

SO for that is it, I can't really think of anything to say, hope you all had an amazing new years eve =)

xx

Already Dec?

Wow, time is definitely moving fast. I didn't even feel it pass by!

We are already in the cold month of December, the last month of the year. At this time I think ''OMG a year has already passed!''

I have been through and have done so much, but at the same time, I feel like i have got so many more things I need to do, and like every year I promise myself that next year would be different. Next year I would change this and that, and try to be more like this and that and in the end, nothing really changes, I stay the same, but I do admit amazing things do happen that have an effect on me, so I am just waiting for that.

I am looking forward to what next year holds for me, maybe a new prince charming? Maybe a new heartbreak? Maybe a new twin bestfriend and maybe and end to a friendship?

All I am saying that life is unexpected and that is what makes it so special.

So hello December, I didn't see you coming, but I am looking forward to what comes after you.

Oh and a special person's birthday is in December too >